Look out for me

Not sure whether womazzle will continue.  Google seems bent on making access to it difficult.  

I will try to keep the site open, but this might just be my last post for now.   

I will be around though.  Somewhere.  

Look out for far out bits and pieces about this world and the one to come...

... IF.

Aestival

I believe that each summer we crave to relive the mad exhilaration of childhood. 

PS Sunstruck

Years ago, our third child had just been born, I opened a gate to the outside world like a drowning person pushing open the door of a sinking car, and started a podcast with a friend. 

I did most of the editing at night, teaching myself Garageband and online publishing skills while frantically working away at my stories. 

I loved it – that sacred space of creativity and seemingly endless potential which I shared with my soul mate at the time, even though it meant adding to my already deadly fatigue and restlessness. 

We managed to publish four one hour-long episodes much in the format of This American Life by the irreverently funny Ira Glass.  

The domaine name has long since expired and so has the site that was hosting Sunstruck.  But the memory of the moments of crazed commitment working on a project with a friend and sharing the product with the world has stayed with me.  

What a great energy we had going!

Love you loads, Susan!!

It

Ultimately I think that men are rather one dimensional.  They get stuck with one idea, one thing that drives them, and that’s it.  If you are planning to spend a life-time together, it’s best to find out what that one thing is.  Baseball?  Trains  ?   Or possibly their job ?

With women it’s different.  They only seem truly happy, if everyone around them is happy.  “Happy” means different things for different people and what it is that makes people happy is basically impossibe to know.  Food is usually a good guess, but then, I know quite a few people, who get annoyed with that kind of nurturing over-mother thing.  End result:  Everyone is unhappy.  

Seems to me, that we really should start cracking on that third gender, that perfect balance...it would make a lot of things a whole lot easier!

Sleepless in bed...

Do you know the feeling?  You go to bed at midnight, tired and happy that you made it through another day without messing up the world too badly, only to wake up two hours later, knowing fair well, that you are toast. 

Nevertheless you go ahead and try to relax (because you know that’s your best bet): you focus on thinking soporific thoughts (does Rachel love Ross after all?), you imagine squirrels asleep in their nest, you feel your limbs seemingly getting heavier and you busily blot out anything that might make your heart rate speed up (chocolate consumption or account levels, software issues, lost stuff, and probably a large range of friends&family stuff as well) – until there is no way around accepting the fact that your bladder has slowly but surely been filling up and is now full to the rim so that you actually will have to get up. 

Lavishly cursing your lot, you get up and make your way down an underheated hallway and plop down on a chilly toilet seat with a sigh.

But sometimes, I have found, that that is actually a good thing to do.  Getting up.  It’s like a reboot.   Because when I eventually get back to bed, I actually want to be there to warm up my feet and give my wobbly circulation a break.

In fact it is much harder to go back to sleep at 5am.  But recently I didn’t have much need for that.

Ssshhht...he can hear you!

I am up writing this when I know I will regret it tomorrow, but while I will be drowsy tomorrow I am wide awake right now.  A leaden headache has finally lifted off and blown away, after a day of probability problems and the Konjunktiv Irrealis (do I need to say more).  

We finished the day with a walk in the milky fog of and English November afternoon.  The kids all needed airing and I needed to gain some territory.  Eventually, J. caught up with me and, tugging on my sleeve, reassured me “You are doing everything right, mom!

”Was I talking out loud...?

Smiles

Living every day as if it counts.  Making the best out of every moment.  Seeing the bright side, the silver lining, the glass half full...!  

Best to figure out how to get good at that over time.  

It's either that of a really fat midlife crisis.  

And who wants that...?!

Not just Anything

After another round of who done what (and who didn't) around the house, I lost my calm.

All that boring stuff about getting the trash to the curb on time, emptying the dishwasher, not leaving food out over night and smelly socks throughout the house, sometimes makes me want to leave and join the Bedouins.

What would happen to the trash and the socks then, I wonder...?  

Instead it's the weekend and this nonsense keeps  creeping up on us and making me fester with arrrgh.

J., now nine, came over to me after M. had left with a huff.  "What happened?" he wanted to know and I told him that I had lost my calm and that his dad didn't really do anything.

"You mean 'anything' both ways, right?"

Hm.

Where have all my friends gone...????

I criss crossed the English countryside yesterday in search of a fat cheeked yellow fellow but I only found SQUASH!!

Roaming School

The funnest thing about homeschooling is that we can pop up our tent about anywhere.  So we are off for a bit now to see how much French we really know.  Luckily my aunt has a house in the dunes - and it's gonna be a scorcher weekend.  Just what this slightly tattered soul needs.  So...bisous bisous! 

Patri-ego-tism

Although I am not a Brit, I would feel sad to see this union fall apart. 

Just imagine not having the union flag on every tea mug purchased on this patriotic shoal!  Or think about how sad the Queen must be to let go of Balmoral...or was it some other illustre place where she likes to roam around in her jeep?  Who would be Queen of Scots actually?  Some Mary?  Would there still be Haggis in the frozen section or would British...uh...Smaller Britain patriotism forbid that? Hm. 

Well, we will know soon enough whether we will have to grab a passport on our next trip to Edinburgh...but then, it always felt a bit foreign up there!!

Dig that!

September and with it the love, turmoil and redemption.  We are back to homeEd.  I love it, but it makes my day that much shorter.  But, hey, I am back to studying classics, music theory and my much beloved book of 1,000 amazing facts!!  Did you know that there are salt water crocodiles in Australia?  That poor continent really got the short end of the stick.  Sharks, spiders, jelly fish, scorpions...you name it !!!

On Days Like This...

…life finally slows down and comes to a standstill like a cloud on a late summer evening.  It lingers like a bee on purple lavender. 

Happy and absorbed. 

I have not left the seaside today.  Through the window of my room I have been watching the waves batter the pebble beach, the foamy green churl and heave under the whipping wind before crashing against the rocky bay.

 

Thanks be to all you nymphs and mighty trident bearer!! 

I needed that!    

Lemonade Anyone ?

It's a good thing to know how to make lemonade if you are handed lemons -

 - that is if you like lemonade.