Patchwork

Over the past decades, family structures have become looser than ever before - at least in the Western world.

And at some point, the term “patchwork family” was coined to describe adults and children living together in relationships extending beyond those of the original biological family - usually after that family ceased to exist.

With a history of wars, famine, poverty and disease, the human family has always been under stress. A significant number of children has always been reared by other than their biological parents. Relatives, the state, and strangers often had to step in when plan A didn’t work out.

A reality that can shape a life forever.

Yet, there are quite a few voices who like to downplay the effects this can have on a child. Patchwork is in, it seems.

Patchwork embellishes the harsh and often intangible realities of childhood in the 21st century.

Of course, I distance myself from those who decry the decline of the “traditional family” blaming it on eroding (Christian) values and the “onslaught of feminism”, but I nevertheless wonder how healthy patchwork really is - and also, how unavoidable it is.

By definition, patchwork is created from the left-overs of a carefully designed and crafted original. It describes a more or less haphazardly stitched together pattern made up from the remnants of whatever it was that fell apart. And patchwork families are often exactly that: stitched together parts of the original families that were worn down by heavy use.

Which begs the questions, who is wearing out the families of the 21st centuries? Why are the pressures such that the seams rip even though there are no devastating wars, famines or pandemics?

Or to be more concrete:

Why do families over night have to adapt to the demands of the so-called global economy? Why does a regular work week in a decently salaried position amounts to fifty hours and more? Why, I ask, have real wages not increased since the 1970s, thereby making it often unaffordable to raise a family of four on one income only?

You know the answer. Someone is skimming off the cream while the masses watch and the patchwork is growing.