Move over, Eva!

Boxes are great for storing things - any thing really: rubber bands, old photos, stray tampons. They are extremely useful when you want to avoid clutter. I have known people who keep their underwear and sox in compartmentalized boxes; and although that’s taking it a bit far maybe, it still looks convincingly neat.

The real problem only arises when people put each other into boxes and shut the lid. One might get stuck in one labeled “uncool” or “too chatty”, but worse than that is to land in one of the big solid boxes without breathing holes marked “wrong background.”

“Wrong” meaning anything really. Nobody really knows for sure what is wrong. There are, of course, the obvious suspects such as “length of ear lobes” and “roof color,” but what do you do about the less tangible distinctions such as “family” and “schooling”?

It seems that in this Island Nation, everyone is very concerned about avoiding the great sucking maelstrom which may end up pulling them into that box without any hope of ever seeing the blue skies again. Ever!!

As an outsider to the struggle for “most royal British accent” etc., I look at it all with mild befuddlement, wondering in which box we have been politely placed. I faintly remember seeing Eva Braun adorned with a New York Yankees baseball cap floating around in it.

At least her husband wasn’t there!

I am glad to introduce...

LEROY - the coolest cat....may he reign our house for a long, long time.
PS Don't you think he has smashingly good looks....?

...oh and she also gave me this...

And she means no offense. It’s a negativity-sucker-upper-mother-goddess tampon fabrication. Like I need that!!! Hahaha.

Zoë blushed politely and sighed “Oh Peta”, Lea pretended to be blind and Jules threw a full blown fit because he was not allowed to touch her (and no man ever will be!!).

I love her and vow to protect her. There shall be no lame gods beside her. A proper atheist alter will be established for her in the bottom of a box in a dark corner underneath my bed and I promise to cherish her to the end of my black days.

Thank you woman!

Look what Peta made...

for Lea's b'day!!

Enjoy your Future - for it may not be there tomorrow!

Very little is left to chance in this well organized nation. It would, for instance, not occur to anyone to just show up at a restaurant and expect to be seated. Of course, you call for a reservation, preferably a few days ahead of time.

And if you are planning to go into London you may as well plan the entire day a month ahead of time...no, make that two months.

Seeing an exhibition, going to the zoo, watching a show, or even going ice skating requires
online booking, the exchange of confirmation numbers, printed vouchers and lengthy contractual fine print several weeks ahead of the planned event.

But one would jump to conclusions suggesting that a lack of spontaneity or even a certain lack of flexibility were at the root of this phenomenon.

Quite to the contrary.

If it weren’t for their euphoric and sheer overwhelming optimism, how could Brits assume they are even still on the map in two months from now!!!

I mean, hello, I wouldn’t put any money down to see myself get out of bed tomorrow. But then again, I am not a Brit.

Still gestanden!

Been a bit busy. One more birthday now and then I can come up for air. But first things first: Lea is turning seven and she is getting a cat.

So here I am fighting around with the RSPCA, one of the many many Royal Societies with a noble cause. This one claims it protects animals by terrorizing those who are willing to take them in after they have been mistreated and/or abandoned by their original owners.

By now I have filled out more forms than it took to get a Costa Rican birth certificate, our future pet has met the ENTIRE family which took several visits, and our landlord has stopped answering his phone.

Tomorrow will be critical because the RSPCA house inspector has informed us that she will come by at 11:00am to decide whether our dwellings are appropriate for cat ownership, and I can already tell, she has true Nazi qualities. They opposed animal cruelty as well, you know...

Adelante!

And here we are a few tentative steps into the new year, furtive looks around the corner, the curtain is drawn, no time to review the lines or rehearse the steps. Chances are not much has changed anyway. So, onward we go.