A Case of Mistaken Identity

Why is it that most people seem to confuse who they are with what they do? I am a teacher, I am a swim instructor, I am a tax attorney. Why is it that they choose to reduce their individuality to professional terminology? Maybe it feels safer than saying, I ‘work as’ a teacher, swim instructor, or tax attorney, which sounds more transient, as if you haven’t found your true vocation.

But what if you work as a garbage collector, INS officer, or as a prison ward? Maybe that would be a box one doesn’t even really want to fit in. I have actually heard people working in less desirable jobs paraphrase: Instead of saying ‘I am a garbage collector’ they will say, for instance, that they 'work in' waste management. After all, anything that includes the term ‘management’ tends to acquire some of the glitter attributed to the good old gray back occupation of ‘management’ – even if all that it amounts to is picking up people’s empty milk cartons and smelly leftovers.

Alternatively, one may hear someone saying that s/he is 'working for' the INS or for the state prison system thereby giving the profession a sheen of duty-fulfillment and obligation. The intention is to prompt a reaction along the lines of ‘Ah, yes, that’s a very important job for society.’ And again, identity is defined: We must be dealing with an upright citizen living up to a difficult job.

Sometimes, it fees like people are hiding behind job titles that consist of a sheer endless number of arbitrary nouns like Principal Assistant Director suggesting importance where there is none. Clearly, that’s not a safe thing to do. A big bluff calls for a big laugh.

Although almost anyone can probably empathize with the wish to be someone, most people like to debunk someone else’s bluff, or cut down whatever it is people do: Lawyers are sharks, doctors are in it for the money, teachers are know-it-alls, etc. What is it about identity – ours and that of others – that makes us so nervous?

I can tell you, personally, I don’t particularly enjoy having to write ‘mother’ as my profession on every form, be it at the doctor’s, immigration, or the Department of Motor Vehicles. My instinct tells me that puts me in a pretty small box somewhere between garbage collector and know-it-all. However, alternatively, ‘homemaker’ is just another bluff, ‘homeschooling parent’ reveals more than I want to, and leaving it blank slightly understates the fact that I am working my ass off 24/7.

So, where does that leave me? Maybe I should start calling myself ‘Lady Madonna.’ Now there is a case of mistaken identity.