Name a Price !

Is price a guarantee for quality? What price is realistic for a product that is made with durable materials and purposeful technology in a process that respects both labour and environmental laws and is locally produced? I am willing to pay a price, or save the money until I am able to pay the price as long as the thing, whatever it is, lasts and works well. Someone just please make an unsponsored list of stuff that actually works and I will treasure it with my life!!

Puppy-dogs' tails

J. has his friends over and they are in the garden knocking each other over, tumbling on top of each other while giggling hysterically. All I can see are heads knocking into noses and elbows bruising cheek bones. When they come up for a bit of air, I open the back door and holler to take it easy, especially J. who seems massive compared to the other first graders. I am greeted with three beamish smiles and the reassurance that it’s all right since the whole point of the exercise is for J. to knock their front teeth out. And I thought that’s what a crisp Granny Smith was for...

Being There

Having been in this job now for almost fifteen years now, this much I know: you tend to get out of it what you invest in it - and I don’t mean money. Parenting is by far the most time consuming endeavor you could take on apart from being human. It will require every last iota of your cognitive and emotional ability and it will make your brain grow new pathways in nanoseconds, simply because often your life (and your child’s life) depend on it. From learning to skillfully handle various kinds and amounts of bodily fluids to efficiently communicate with the parents of the class bully, from keeping an open mind to ever changing health and safety advices to forming a clear and consistent set of rules, from establishing a relationship of trust to admitting fault when necessary, and from being believable to being unbelievably goofy, it will help to acquire a certain level of agility in a variety of areas. All of this takes time and lots of practice...years of practice, but then, we are in it for the long run anyway...!

Lucky You !

If you were born in the last forty years into a country belonging to the so-called Western Hemisphere, if you were born into a family without any history of abuse and furthermore if you were born healthy and with a moderate all around intelligence and the will to stay out of trouble and work hard and you haven’t had to deal with any major personal hardships then, really, things are looking pretty good - even if you are still earning minimum wage at age thirty and are living with your parents. Anything better than that and you can truly count yourself lucky and it may be time for pay back. The world is a pretty screwed up place and the best those lucky ones of us can do is to make it better!

February Fool

Once again I had thought myself to have given a perfect rendition of Father Christmas: the omniscient (almost there), fat (oh well), sexless (I guess that is sort of crucial to the roll) octogenarian (half way there...) who is vexingly smart (...), because he knows not only about every mishap but also happens to know the most ardent wishes of his little devotees. From skateboards to triple ball bearing diablos, from sowing kits to purple tutus, from remote controlled helicopters to friendship books and scooters, the guy knows not only what kids want, but where to get it. And so did I. A few months later, however, Jules wonders why on Earth Santa didn’t know that all that cool stuff he brought turned out to be absolute garbage. The remote helicopter didn’t last three minutes before the back propeller broke off (utterly not Jules’ fault), the scooter lost its break pedal within a month and the beginner sowing machine never sowed a stitch, because the needle it came with was bent, and I am just waiting for the diablo string to snap any minute now... However, the friendship book still works...

Other People's Kids

Before having one’s own children, other people’s children tend to be non-entities, unless they happen to be either really annoying or else closely related (and sometimes both). Generally you will go about your life without thinking too much about them. Occasionally you might feel the urge to kick one out of the way or drop by for a slice of birthday cake, but most of the time - unless you make it your job to take care of them - your life will remain undisturbed by runny noses and pouty lips. All that changes when you start having children. Suddenly, children in general will enter your radar and you will start remembering odd things about them like their pets name, the days they attend playgroups and things like food allergies and favorite colors. You will share your biscuits with them on the playground and you will eagerly pass your cell phone to their parents when they forgot theirs. Basically, the minute you are caught up catering to your own lovely offspring you will also bend over backwards to keep their friends happy, because that makes your life a whole lot easier - or so you think. And so you will befriend parents, even when you don’t really have much in common with them and you will invite their children over and do your best to entertain them, even when you don’t particularly care for them either, because not only is it good for junior, but also, their parents might return the favor and host the next play date. I am on my fifteenth year of hosting and catering for other people’s kids. I have seen friends come and go, I had to fix my black leather three seater after one birthday party and I had to replant my hydrangea. Nothing too horrible. There were a few accidents and a couple of close calls, which I could avert in the last minute, but all in all, I have made it through the first sticky years of childhood three times over, and so have all in my care. But I wouldn’t want to do it over again. The truth is, I don’t particularly like other people’s kids usually and I have a sneaking suspicion, no one does. For the time being, however, one ends up doing it and with it how best to negotiate the tricky bits, the insurance claims, the bruises, the little things gone missing. I suppose in the end one always hopes that the good memories will outlast the rotten ones and maybe even, that the kids will in the end form some lasting friendships - real ones, good ones.